Friday, 29 August 2008

To summarise...

I am now 10 days from moving out of my house. I have bought a tent, I have filled it with fabric based furnishings and I have learned a great deal about starting fires, sewing and kilowatt hours. My wood burning stove is due to arrive shortly, the camp site has confirmed my booking and the dog is now tent trained.

It may seem a trifle odd to some that a successful 30 year old man would want to move from his comfy accommodation with its pocket sprung bed, power shower and huge high definition television to go and live in a tent. You wouldn't be the first person to call me a fool for wanting to endure the British winter under canvas, but I have my reasons and most people have been quite easy to persuade of the merits of the idea.

The foremost of these merits is that I want to rid myself of all debt. I owe about ten thousand pounds and I feel it like a stone around my neck. I wear the yoke of idiotic consumerism and it is dragging me down. I shall not go into the where's and why for's of how I came by this rotten burden, suffice to say it is the result of living fractionally beyond my means for years. I know that I could sit tight for a couple more years and keep making the repayments but I am an impatient man, which is probably why I am in the situation I am in. By moving into a tent, I can accelerate the process of redemption and maybe even save some money to buy a house.

Debt is not my only reason though, the whole idea has other incidental benefits. One major part of moving into a tent has been disposing of my many useless possessions. I have been able to free myself of a huge amount of actual and emotional baggage just by letting it all go. Goodbye toaster. I promise to miss you occasionally. By reducing the amount of space I have and having to cart all my garb about often, it will be hard to accumulate dross without having to sacrifice something useful.

My carbon footprint will turn from a stomp to a tiptoe overnight and I will be free to travel where I choose. I will be able to take in a variety of vistas from a front door that I have permission to decorate and if I don't like the neighbours I can just move. The freedom, the savings and the communing with nature that will inevitably accompany this adventure will make even the lowest, dampest times a bit more bearable.

Hopefully though, with a little ingenuity and resourcefulness this whole caper can be a comfortable one. The tent is now very cosy and will soon offer most of the creature comforts I am used to, I will get wetter more often but I spend half my time shambling about in the drizzle with the dog anyway. I reckon I can be debt free by spring and the summer will be a joy of light evenings and barbecues. In the land of real people I am but a man living in a tent but when festival season comes, I will be king.

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